Forgiveness (Pick-up lines Chapter 4)

Starbucks Makati.  Around September 2010.

'Hot coffee mocha please.  Grande, to go', I ordered.

'One grande hot coffee mocha to go for Hush', Ice the barista called out to the coffee operator, or whatever they call it.

'One grande hot coffee mocha to go for Hush', echoed another barista.

I glanced up.  His gaze met mine.  Gosh, he had the most gorgeous eyes I had ever seen.  If eyes could twinkle, his was.  He was bronze (or moreno sige na nga), not normally my type, but I was fascinated with him.  Marco (my officemate) later described him as a Jacob "twilight' look-alike (including the nose hehehe).

'Who's he?' I asked Ice since she knew me.

'Marky. Uuuuuyyy, type mo sya noh?', she teased me.  

'hahaha yah, can I get his number?', I chided.

'Tanungin mo, talo kayo teh'

'Heh!'

I got my coffee, smiled at Marky and left.

A month after.

'Hi Hush, tagal mo na di nakapasyal rito ah', was the warm greet by Ice.

'Ya, busy with work'  I glanced around.  'San na si Marky?'

'Ahh, pang-umaga sya ngayon but mag.re.resign na sya'

My heart sank.  Shucks, I wasn't able to get his number at mag.reresign na sya?? 

'So kelan sya magreresign?' I casually asked.

'Last week na nya next week'  I jot that down in my head.

The week after.  November 2010.

'Ferns, samahan mo ko coffee, dyan lang sa harap ng office'

'hmmm, may pinagtripan ka noh?', was his reply.

'Wala poh', was my innocent response.

I was beginning to be infatuated with the guy.  Naging stalker ako! hahahaha When I saw him again, he literally lit up the place. hehehe  He was on break that time and I asked Ice to introduce me to him.

'Hi', Marky said.

'Hi, I'm Hush :)' (syempre la yung smiley face sa sinabi ko :)), matagal ka na ba rito?'

'di naman, kaka 1 month palang, pero mag-reresign na ako', he smiled.

'ahhh, kalungkot naman. bakit?'

'la lang, I'm juggling 2 jobs now'

'ahh.. hmmm.. you want sama ka sa gimik namin ni Ferns? Mahilig ka ba mag Malate?'

'yup. went there last Black party'

'sige, bigay mo number mo, text kita', was my pick-up line :p

Needless to say, he became my constant textmate and he hang out at my place.  I couldn't sleep the first time he crash over as I was literally staring at him go to sleep, plus he was a Titanic.  I kidded him when he woke up,

'di ata lumuwas ang barko kagabi, panay buga ng makina!'

'har har, gusto mo higupin kita sa ilong ko', gazing at me with his twinkling eyes.

I was mesmerized.  Puttanesca, in love ata ako.


November 29.  Holiday.


'San ka?', Marky texted.


'Dito office, trabaho ng maigi para sa future asawa ko ;)', was my mischievous response.


'Puntahan kita dyan'


'Talaga? What time?' puttanesca, kinilig ako.


'Mga 10pm'


'Cge'


We ended up at Starbucks, since it was the only place open that day.  We had the usual pa-cute conversations and the usual jokes we lash out at each other.  But the moment was cut short because of my big mouth.


'Alis na ako Hush, kelangan ko na pasok eh. May training pa ako'


'Bilis naman..'


'Oo, trainee pa kasi ako, kaya kelangan pa good impression'


'Hmf, nagpalibre ka lang ata ng Starbucks', I realized too late that it was not a good joke.  He took it hard.


'Hoy, magkano ba yang kapi na yan, eto pera'


Jokes are half-meant, I know, but I didn't take it that he was that affected. hehe  He still offered me his goodnight kiss that night and I had apologized sincerely after but I didn't realize, kinikimkim pala nya.  He went AWOL in his texts for the next 4 days and I miscalled and texted him within those 4 days (pathetic, I know - kaya nga hirap maglove di ba), extending yet again my apologies for that reckless remark.


Then he texted Sunday.


'Sorry for the late response Hush.  Don't waste your time on me, sorry to say that'


I carefully calculated my response.


'Ok. If that's what you want..'


'Kasi, masyado ako na affected doon sa sinabi mo.  It was a bad joke'


'I know and I regretted that.  For the past 4 days that you ignored me, I lowered my pride to cajole you back.  I'm only human, Marky, and I hope you'll realize I have good intentions for you.'


There were still messages thrown at each other after, but it only concluded the same.  I have regretted throwing that punchline, and believe me I learned my lesson.. hard.  But I also realized, was it so grave that it deserved no second chance?  Then maybe he's not worth the love I could give, so how much more if I offended him when we will be in a relationship?  Nag.sorry na nga yung tao, lalagyan mo pa ng asin yung sugat?


The rants continue and I guess blogging about it helps to minimize the guilt and pain. Drama. hay.


It's a sad story, hushkins, and I realized, tao din pala ako.  Kala ko kasi Dyosa ako. hehehe